Love?

Don’t think I’ve ever gone in love with anyone until recently. Maybe just right after our Malaysia’s 15 year-old test.

I don’t really get the meaning of love. Is it just more than friendship? Or is it a whole lot more than liking? One thing’s for sure though, I’ll never get one, not in my current state. Communications are my weakest subject of life that I’ve ever learned. Talking, especially with opposing gender, n…n…not my best. Moreover with my straight forward thinking. Speaking sometimes — most of the times actually — without the permission or being checked by my brain.

But then, that feeling is unbearable. the pounding heart when I ever gone near her, the slowed reaction whenever I think about her, maybe I will never go through it, not now, maybe not ever.

I know she loved someone deep down, but its for sure it will never be me, not even when I’m the only one to consider. Since that I know she loved one, I never bothered with trying. My heart will never go pass the pain when it comes to an end. Dare’s got a point, it might be fun while you’re at it, but really hurts when it is time to part.

This page is actually inspired by many of my friends that had written their opinion about love. To me, love’s meaning is always like a vulture, looking for a chance to get the best of its prey. Although love isn’t about hunting, its more to getting know to each other, loving each other for their special personality. Or as some thought its for the sake of pleasure, making people sad by using cruel ways to abandon them after the long rounds of love.

My love story is really short, you can also presume that it had never started. To me, its the same for both of the world. Unwilling to risk my feelings for some puppy love that might never come in the end as true love, I will never reveal the truth in my heart, for fear to cause pain in others.

To Dare, he would risk his life for the sake of reestablishing his love to a certain someone. To YangZi, he will keep the feelings to himself, not wanting anyone to know it while to Coffee, its to love each other no matter the consequences behind the hands of fate, or otherwise, Destiny.

Destiny has a foul, warped sense of humour. It can link two heart to heart directly in their world, then separate them to see them get out of the sticky situation and continue their love life. Some said there are meddlers with the ability to mess with the fold of destiny as he see fit, but I don’t think such strong force ever existed.

The one I love are most certainly in love with someone I can never reach since I don’t know anything of this stranger, just that I know I’m not an worthy enemy in the ways of love. Despite the fact, I still bear the pain of loving.

I’ll wait, like the hunter under the tree, for the rabbits to fall in the trap.